1
00:00:00,827 --> 00:00:02,483
[Narrator] Previously
on Forgive Me.

2
00:00:02,483 --> 00:00:05,207
Why do you think they
told you in confession?

3
00:00:05,207 --> 00:00:07,861
[intense music]

4
00:00:10,310 --> 00:00:13,448
So you would know and not tell.

5
00:00:13,448 --> 00:00:16,241
[music continues]

6
00:00:18,654 --> 00:00:20,620
They sucked you in.

7
00:00:20,620 --> 00:00:22,482
You're a part of 'em.

8
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You're part of the coverup.

9
00:00:25,276 --> 00:00:26,172
[intense music]

10
00:00:26,172 --> 00:00:28,965
I listened to you Pete.

11
00:00:28,965 --> 00:00:31,103
I believed that what
my son was doing,

12
00:00:31,103 --> 00:00:34,172
selling drugs, was a
threat to my community

13
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and an abomination against God

14
00:00:36,827 --> 00:00:40,654
that he was spreading
crime and sick--

15
00:00:40,654 --> 00:00:43,965
Nobody can blame you
Gladi for obeying the law.

16
00:00:43,965 --> 00:00:45,276
Nobody's going to blame you

17
00:00:45,276 --> 00:00:46,516
for doing what you
thought was right.

18
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But they do blame me.

19
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My son blames me, my
daughter, my sister.

20
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They all saw me choosing
the law over my own child.

21
00:00:54,551 --> 00:00:56,620
Now I'm not someone who has
blind faith in the Lord.

22
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Not at all.

23
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I know better.

24
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But I have faith in his church

25
00:01:02,034 --> 00:01:06,069
and I followed it and now
I've been made a fool.

26
00:01:06,069 --> 00:01:07,723
What did you
think would happen

27
00:01:07,723 --> 00:01:09,896
when you let this
cat out of the bag?

28
00:01:09,896 --> 00:01:12,930
When you gave him a
forty year old letter

29
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saying the priest knew
about his abuse, huh?

30
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This is what happens.

31
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[upbeat music]

32
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? Ave Maria

33
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? Ave Maria

34
00:01:53,723 --> 00:01:56,413
[dramatic music]

35
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Oh I didn't mean to scare you.

36
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You overslept.

37
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What time is it?

38
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8:45.

39
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Why have you been wearing
bandages on your hands?

40
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What?

41
00:02:27,654 --> 00:02:28,930
Your hands. They look fine.

42
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Why the bandages?

43
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I guess they're better.

44
00:02:36,930 --> 00:02:38,654
You feel all right?

45
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You seem tired.

46
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Can I take your tray away?

47
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Oh yeah. Go ahead.

48
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Can I ask you something
your excellency?

49
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Go ahead.

50
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Is it your plan to
sell the church off

51
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for the land that is sitting on?

52
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I'm in the midst

53
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of negotiating a settlement
between the parish

54
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and whoever is offering.
- I know.

55
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So until that's settled,

56
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no one knows what
happens to your church.

57
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How low would the
settlement have to be

58
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for the church to survive?

59
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Why?

60
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I mean, you put me in
charge of the parish, sir.

61
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I just want to know
what I'm up against.

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Who do you think
you're up against?

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The accuser,

64
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or the parish, me?

65
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Frankly,

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whichever one of you is
trying to tear down my church.

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That remains to be seen.

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[door bangs]

69
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[footsteps approaching]

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Thanks Gladi.

71
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Father.

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Nice to see you again.

73
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Me too, I guess.

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00:04:14,620 --> 00:04:17,241
In the name of the
father, son, Holy spirit.

75
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Forgive me, father
for I have sinned.

76
00:04:19,965 --> 00:04:22,551
It's been two weeks
since my last confession.

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I'm ready.

78
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I tried it.

79
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You tried what?

80
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Pot.

81
00:04:34,723 --> 00:04:35,689
You tried pot.

82
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I smoked some pot.

83
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I see.

84
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Went to the liquor
store, plunked out my $20

85
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and said, "Give me some pot."

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[priest chuckles]

87
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Okay.

88
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Well, I guess technically
that's a sin, but I mean $20.

89
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That doesn't sound
so bad, right?

90
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With, uh, with liquor,

91
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they say it's all about
moderation, right?

92
00:04:58,069 --> 00:04:59,275
Oh I know it.

93
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Jesus turned water into wine,

94
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but didn't turn grass
or no grass. [chuckles]

95
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Can hear you.

96
00:05:08,482 --> 00:05:09,689
Are you high right now?

97
00:05:09,689 --> 00:05:11,447
No I'm not high
right now. Good Lord.

98
00:05:11,447 --> 00:05:12,689
I'm sorry. I just,

99
00:05:12,689 --> 00:05:13,861
you just, you seem
a little different

100
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than you did the last time.

101
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Well, I'm not angry today.

102
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Oh, that's good.

103
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That's great.

104
00:05:20,344 --> 00:05:24,792
Okay. So how much pot
does $20 buy these days?

105
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Did you keep it
within moderation?

106
00:05:27,930 --> 00:05:30,447
Well, I didn't
smoke it all myself.

107
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I shared it.

108
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You shared it with who?

109
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The Women's Auxiliary

110
00:05:40,792 --> 00:05:42,551
The Women's Auxilli...

111
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the women's auxiliary here?

112
00:05:44,309 --> 00:05:45,965
Yes the women's
auxiliary here.

113
00:05:48,103 --> 00:05:50,654
You smoked marijuana
with the women's auxiliary.

114
00:05:50,654 --> 00:05:53,447
Well, we thought there
was going to be a funeral,

115
00:05:53,447 --> 00:05:55,620
you know for, for the priest.

116
00:05:55,620 --> 00:05:57,827
Yeah. For Father John. Yeah.

117
00:05:57,827 --> 00:05:59,654
Yeah. So we made
all the sandwiches

118
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and Candy made
her perfect rolls,

119
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and Ruth made her lemon squares.

120
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I made my carrot cake and
Maryland made her a short bread.

121
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Okay.

122
00:06:09,896 --> 00:06:11,378
And then there
was no fear at all.

123
00:06:11,378 --> 00:06:14,482
Right. We, uh, we had to
make some other arrangements.

124
00:06:15,896 --> 00:06:18,482
So we got high and
then we ate it all.

125
00:06:21,447 --> 00:06:23,689
So you and The
Women's Auxiliary,

126
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you all got together.

127
00:06:25,516 --> 00:06:26,930
Mm-hmm.

128
00:06:26,930 --> 00:06:28,585
You made some sandwiches
and some desserts

129
00:06:28,585 --> 00:06:29,585
for father John's funeral.

130
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Enough for 200 people.

131
00:06:32,447 --> 00:06:34,585
You made enough
food for 200 people,

132
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and then you ate it?

133
00:06:38,034 --> 00:06:39,275
We got the munchies, you know,

134
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cause we were high.

135
00:06:40,689 --> 00:06:42,792
[chuckles] Right.

136
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Yeah, I've heard
that's how it works.

137
00:06:43,827 --> 00:06:45,000
It's a cause and effect, right?

138
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,551
Yeah. And you know what?

139
00:06:46,551 --> 00:06:49,000
Those girls couldn't cook.

140
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:55,620
[chuckles] All right.

141
00:06:55,620 --> 00:06:59,758
Gladi, it's perfectly
understandable

142
00:06:59,758 --> 00:07:04,275
that you would want
to experiment with pot

143
00:07:04,275 --> 00:07:06,482
given your tumultuous
history with it.

144
00:07:07,758 --> 00:07:09,275
Turning your son in
when it was illegal,

145
00:07:09,275 --> 00:07:11,102
having that cost you your
relationship with him.

146
00:07:11,102 --> 00:07:13,171
Now that it is legal,

147
00:07:13,171 --> 00:07:15,930
I understand why you
would want to try it out.

148
00:07:15,930 --> 00:07:17,896
See what you sacrificed
so much over.

149
00:07:18,896 --> 00:07:20,413
Yeah.

150
00:07:20,413 --> 00:07:22,516
But you corrupted the
entire Women's Auxiliary.

151
00:07:22,516 --> 00:07:23,758
No, not all of them.

152
00:07:24,585 --> 00:07:25,792
Beverly McCamus said

153
00:07:25,792 --> 00:07:27,240
she could get stronger
stuff cheaper.

154
00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:28,102
So I don't think I
ruined her innocence

155
00:07:28,102 --> 00:07:30,930
on the whole subject.

156
00:07:30,930 --> 00:07:31,930
Beverly McCamus.

157
00:07:33,447 --> 00:07:35,827
Grandma McCamus,
Carolyn's mother.

158
00:07:35,827 --> 00:07:38,620
Well, she's probably giving
poor Carolyn marijuana.

159
00:07:41,965 --> 00:07:44,344
Wow. This is a lot to digest.

160
00:07:44,344 --> 00:07:46,413
All that food was
going to go to waste.

161
00:07:47,447 --> 00:07:50,827
[sighs] You know what?

162
00:07:50,827 --> 00:07:52,344
Good.

163
00:07:52,344 --> 00:07:55,102
I'm glad y'all had a party
for yourselves for once

164
00:07:55,102 --> 00:07:56,275
though it does sound

165
00:07:56,275 --> 00:07:58,447
like some gluttony
might have transpired.

166
00:07:58,447 --> 00:07:59,965
Oh, for sure.

167
00:07:59,965 --> 00:08:02,344
I had to smack a brownie
out of Mooney Dunphy's hand.

168
00:08:02,344 --> 00:08:03,827
It was like her twelfth.

169
00:08:03,827 --> 00:08:05,309
Okay. [chuckles]

170
00:08:05,309 --> 00:08:07,827
Do you have anything
else you want to confess?

171
00:08:11,206 --> 00:08:12,000
I liked it.

172
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:19,000
It was just silly.

173
00:08:20,689 --> 00:08:22,068
It was relaxing.

174
00:08:22,068 --> 00:08:24,171
I mean, the girls were
all pretty stressed out

175
00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:26,206
when it turned out there
wasn't going to be a funeral.

176
00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:26,999
And then...

177
00:08:30,137 --> 00:08:30,965
It was fun.

178
00:08:34,689 --> 00:08:35,792
I had fun.

179
00:08:39,999 --> 00:08:42,102
I have been doing the very thing

180
00:08:42,965 --> 00:08:44,827
I lost my son over.

181
00:08:48,206 --> 00:08:50,827
Well, I will do anything

182
00:08:50,827 --> 00:08:54,171
to go back and not turn him in.

183
00:08:54,171 --> 00:08:56,964
Anything to have him back.

184
00:08:58,999 --> 00:09:00,896
I'm sorry, Gladi.

185
00:09:00,896 --> 00:09:03,033
All that pain
over a bit of fun.

186
00:09:05,792 --> 00:09:06,758
Um, anyway,

187
00:09:08,102 --> 00:09:08,930
there you have it.

188
00:09:08,930 --> 00:09:09,861
I bought pot,

189
00:09:10,964 --> 00:09:11,964
I smoked it,

190
00:09:11,964 --> 00:09:13,240
and then I pigged out.

191
00:09:14,896 --> 00:09:17,723
Did you ever end up
speaking to your sister?

192
00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:18,689
My sister?

193
00:09:18,689 --> 00:09:19,861
Yeah about being jealous

194
00:09:19,861 --> 00:09:21,413
of her relationship
with her kids.

195
00:09:21,413 --> 00:09:24,240
Yeah. She wasn't
very forgiving.

196
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:26,033
She said I got
what I deserved.

197
00:09:27,758 --> 00:09:29,240
Not true.

198
00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:30,896
Oh, yes it is.

199
00:09:30,896 --> 00:09:32,206
I wouldn't even trust me.

200
00:09:33,102 --> 00:09:35,137
That's why I'm alone.

201
00:09:35,137 --> 00:09:36,792
Gladi, you're a good person.

202
00:09:36,792 --> 00:09:38,378
Hmm, you know what?

203
00:09:40,137 --> 00:09:41,206
You know what's weird?

204
00:09:44,206 --> 00:09:45,861
I felt close to my son.

205
00:09:47,585 --> 00:09:49,447
When I was high, you know,

206
00:09:49,447 --> 00:09:51,896
that's what was in my mind.

207
00:09:54,551 --> 00:09:57,758
I mean, I don't think it has
anything to do with pot now.

208
00:09:57,758 --> 00:10:00,378
He's in all kinds
of other bad stuff,

209
00:10:00,378 --> 00:10:01,206
but,

210
00:10:04,378 --> 00:10:07,033
I felt like I was
going over to his side.

211
00:10:10,275 --> 00:10:11,378
Giving up my ground.

212
00:10:17,413 --> 00:10:18,964
I'm not sure that that's
exactly what he needs

213
00:10:18,964 --> 00:10:20,240
from his mother.

214
00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:21,758
Oh, he doesn't need
anything from me now.

215
00:10:21,758 --> 00:10:23,240
That's all there that.

216
00:10:26,551 --> 00:10:27,964
Time may prove otherwise.

217
00:10:31,102 --> 00:10:31,929
You're ready?

218
00:10:37,964 --> 00:10:39,240
Oh my God,

219
00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:41,240
I am heartily sorry for
having offended you.

220
00:10:42,378 --> 00:10:43,895
I detest all my sins,

221
00:10:45,792 --> 00:10:47,137
Because of your
chest punishment.

222
00:10:47,137 --> 00:10:50,275
But most of all, because
they have offended you.

223
00:10:50,275 --> 00:10:53,413
Oh God, who art all good,

224
00:10:53,413 --> 00:10:54,964
deserving of all my love,

225
00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:58,240
I firmly resolve,

226
00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:00,792
with the help of your
grace to sin no more

227
00:11:00,792 --> 00:11:03,964
and to avoid the
new occasion of sin.

228
00:11:05,654 --> 00:11:08,516
May the Lord grant
your pardon and peace

229
00:11:08,516 --> 00:11:10,585
and I absolve you of your sins.

230
00:11:10,585 --> 00:11:11,827
In the name of the father

231
00:11:11,827 --> 00:11:13,964
and of the son and
of the Holy spirit.

232
00:11:13,964 --> 00:11:14,792
Amen.

233
00:11:18,689 --> 00:11:20,964
For the gluttony,

234
00:11:21,929 --> 00:11:22,929
say a Hail Mary.

235
00:11:25,654 --> 00:11:26,895
For the smoking pot,

236
00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:28,654
I think you've done
penance enough already.

237
00:11:31,585 --> 00:11:32,413
Amen.

238
00:11:39,137 --> 00:11:42,102
[man clears throat]

239
00:11:46,585 --> 00:11:47,964
How'd you get there?

240
00:11:47,964 --> 00:11:48,999
We can pass.

241
00:11:51,447 --> 00:11:52,240
From?

242
00:11:53,378 --> 00:11:54,309
What do you think?

243
00:11:59,309 --> 00:12:00,826
I miss you.

244
00:12:00,826 --> 00:12:03,758
It's weird how you never
missed me when I was alive.

245
00:12:03,758 --> 00:12:05,654
I just didn't want to see you

246
00:12:05,654 --> 00:12:07,068
when you're drunk.

247
00:12:09,102 --> 00:12:11,929
[water splashing]

248
00:12:29,860 --> 00:12:32,413
[wind howling]

249
00:13:08,171 --> 00:13:10,929
[dramatic music]

250
00:13:46,378 --> 00:13:47,206
Hello?

251
00:13:52,171 --> 00:13:53,102
I'm not afraid of you.

252
00:13:53,102 --> 00:13:54,344
I'm not going to chase you

253
00:13:54,344 --> 00:13:55,482
if you want me come
down and get me.

254
00:13:58,929 --> 00:13:59,654
Me?

255
00:14:01,171 --> 00:14:02,378
Maria?

256
00:14:02,378 --> 00:14:03,826
Yeah. What's the
matter with you?

257
00:14:10,171 --> 00:14:11,722
Hey, how are you?

258
00:14:12,929 --> 00:14:14,860
I was rude to you
father and I'm sorry.

259
00:14:14,860 --> 00:14:16,826
No, please stop being
the sensitive one.

260
00:14:16,826 --> 00:14:18,722
I accept your apology.

261
00:14:18,722 --> 00:14:20,620
I apologize to you.

262
00:14:20,620 --> 00:14:21,447
Did it count?

263
00:14:23,068 --> 00:14:24,516
The confession?

264
00:14:24,516 --> 00:14:26,826
Uh, yeah. I said the
prayer of absolution for you.

265
00:14:26,826 --> 00:14:28,344
Did you say the 10 Hail Mary's?

266
00:14:28,344 --> 00:14:29,309
I said 50.

267
00:14:30,309 --> 00:14:31,482
That'll do it.

268
00:14:31,482 --> 00:14:32,757
Did you want to?

269
00:14:32,757 --> 00:14:34,895
Oh no. I haven't
had time to sin.

270
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:36,688
Do you wanna sit?

271
00:14:36,688 --> 00:14:37,516
Yeah.

272
00:14:44,791 --> 00:14:47,344
[priest sighs]

273
00:14:49,999 --> 00:14:51,551
My mother would roll
over in her grave

274
00:14:51,551 --> 00:14:53,309
if she knew how I
spoke to a priest.

275
00:14:55,344 --> 00:14:57,722
We get treated with
reverence by default.

276
00:14:57,722 --> 00:14:59,653
It's nice to get held
accountable from time to time.

277
00:14:59,653 --> 00:15:01,068
I wasn't offended honestly.

278
00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:03,309
And I will join
The Women's Auxiliary

279
00:15:03,309 --> 00:15:04,137
if you want me to.

280
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:05,206
No, no, no, no. I was,

281
00:15:06,068 --> 00:15:07,447
it was a suggestion

282
00:15:09,102 --> 00:15:10,413
and I mean, you know,

283
00:15:10,413 --> 00:15:11,653
now's probably not
even the best time

284
00:15:11,653 --> 00:15:13,102
to be joining The
Women's Auxiliary

285
00:15:13,102 --> 00:15:16,240
so I'm sure we could find
something more suited

286
00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:17,895
to your interest that
doesn't involve cleaning.

287
00:15:17,895 --> 00:15:19,757
Although, you know, to be fair,

288
00:15:19,757 --> 00:15:21,895
most of the volunteer
stuff involves cleaning.

289
00:15:21,895 --> 00:15:23,619
Well, you don't
have to find anything

290
00:15:23,619 --> 00:15:25,757
to keep me busy Father.

291
00:15:25,757 --> 00:15:30,447
I mean, the church isn't
exactly the cure for loneliness.

292
00:15:30,447 --> 00:15:31,378
Can help though.

293
00:15:32,584 --> 00:15:35,068
Every time I come
in here, you're alone.

294
00:15:36,413 --> 00:15:37,447
Never really alone.

295
00:15:40,619 --> 00:15:43,275
That priest who
killed himself,

296
00:15:43,275 --> 00:15:46,275
that was here at this church?

297
00:15:46,275 --> 00:15:48,378
It didn't happen here,
but he worked here, yeah.

298
00:15:50,206 --> 00:15:52,068
He must've been lonely.

299
00:15:52,068 --> 00:15:53,584
I guess in a way.

300
00:15:53,584 --> 00:15:56,895
But he had a lot of other
things weighing on his mind.

301
00:15:56,895 --> 00:15:58,550
It wasn't just loneliness.

302
00:16:00,378 --> 00:16:02,137
You're not
considering suicide--

303
00:16:02,137 --> 00:16:03,653
God, no.

304
00:16:03,653 --> 00:16:06,826
I wouldn't kill myself and
burn in hell for all eternity.

305
00:16:06,826 --> 00:16:07,757
That's a relief.

306
00:16:09,619 --> 00:16:11,102
My cousin did that.

307
00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:15,171
I prayed a million
prayers for him

308
00:16:15,171 --> 00:16:16,860
and I don't think
it did any good.

309
00:16:17,791 --> 00:16:18,619
It does though, right?

310
00:16:18,619 --> 00:16:19,482
I mean, it's,

311
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:23,171
it's good to keep the
people that we love

312
00:16:23,171 --> 00:16:24,929
in our prayers really.

313
00:16:24,929 --> 00:16:26,653
I did not love Carl.

314
00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:28,688
He was a son of a mother.

315
00:16:28,688 --> 00:16:30,137
[sighs] Can't say
that in front of you.

316
00:16:30,137 --> 00:16:31,275
Uh, I get the drift.

317
00:16:32,791 --> 00:16:34,309
I just don't think that
anyone should burn in hell

318
00:16:34,309 --> 00:16:37,137
for all eternity because
they gave up hope.

319
00:16:38,653 --> 00:16:39,482
Neither do I.

320
00:16:46,791 --> 00:16:50,309
So either way, I think things
are going to have to change.

321
00:16:50,309 --> 00:16:51,550
Either stick around here

322
00:16:51,550 --> 00:16:53,344
or come out of the closet

323
00:16:53,344 --> 00:16:54,860
or we got to leave the area.

324
00:16:54,860 --> 00:16:57,275
You want me to come
out of the closet?

325
00:16:57,275 --> 00:16:58,791
Yeah as my daughter.

326
00:16:58,791 --> 00:16:59,964
[background noise
drowns out sound]

327
00:16:59,964 --> 00:17:01,895
It's not weird
enough around here.

328
00:17:02,722 --> 00:17:04,481
Yeah that weird.

329
00:17:05,515 --> 00:17:06,860
What about you?

330
00:17:06,860 --> 00:17:08,102
What, you think I'm weird?

331
00:17:08,102 --> 00:17:10,653
Are you gonna come
out of the closet?

332
00:17:10,653 --> 00:17:14,171
[sighs] As your father, yeah.

333
00:17:15,171 --> 00:17:15,999
That's all?

334
00:17:17,584 --> 00:17:19,515
Got to work with me on this.

335
00:17:22,378 --> 00:17:24,344
So you'd rather
stick around here

336
00:17:24,344 --> 00:17:26,275
and deal with what people
are going to say about us.

337
00:17:26,275 --> 00:17:30,206
Cause I got to warn you
and I got to be very nice.

338
00:17:30,206 --> 00:17:32,240
I'd rather have a
father than a secret.

339
00:17:34,033 --> 00:17:35,619
Yeah.

340
00:17:35,619 --> 00:17:37,584
It's very deserved
that you always have.

341
00:17:39,033 --> 00:17:41,584
If you said we could
keep things the same,

342
00:17:41,584 --> 00:17:42,584
maybe I would.

343
00:17:43,550 --> 00:17:45,688
But out of leaving and staying,

344
00:17:45,688 --> 00:17:46,999
I would stay.

345
00:17:46,999 --> 00:17:49,826
[machine buzzing]

346
00:17:54,550 --> 00:17:56,860
You know why way Dr.
Linden wanted you to see me?

347
00:17:56,860 --> 00:17:59,860
Yeah. This is my
psychiatric evaluation.

348
00:18:02,102 --> 00:18:04,584
He says it's because
you're reluctant

349
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,309
to have treatment
for a brain tumor.

350
00:18:08,171 --> 00:18:08,999
I was treated.

351
00:18:10,653 --> 00:18:11,481
It was painful.

352
00:18:13,619 --> 00:18:15,102
Couldn't eat, lost all my hair.

353
00:18:16,446 --> 00:18:17,826
It's for religious reasons.

354
00:18:19,275 --> 00:18:22,412
I'm a Catholic I'm not
a Christian scientist,

355
00:18:24,446 --> 00:18:27,446
but yeah. I mean, I think
God's will does factor

356
00:18:27,446 --> 00:18:29,206
into my decision making process.

357
00:18:31,929 --> 00:18:33,791
God wants you to
have a brain tumor.

358
00:18:34,757 --> 00:18:36,102
He put it there, I assume.

359
00:18:37,344 --> 00:18:38,929
He also sent your doctors.

360
00:18:38,929 --> 00:18:40,757
Dr. Linden, the other doctors.

361
00:18:43,344 --> 00:18:44,999
Agnes, yeah.

362
00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:45,826
No you're right.

363
00:18:45,826 --> 00:18:47,446
He did. That's true.

364
00:18:47,446 --> 00:18:50,999
So surrounding you with
doctors and treatments,

365
00:18:52,102 --> 00:18:53,068
it's also God's will.

366
00:18:57,757 --> 00:18:59,964
Since I've known
about the tumor,

367
00:18:59,964 --> 00:19:01,964
I mean even a little bit
before I was aware of it,

368
00:19:01,964 --> 00:19:04,826
I've experienced visitations.

369
00:19:05,999 --> 00:19:07,137
From who?

370
00:19:08,206 --> 00:19:09,344
Saints and martyrs.

371
00:19:11,309 --> 00:19:13,515
My brother Christopher,
some angels.

372
00:19:13,515 --> 00:19:15,446
Your brother's deceased?

373
00:19:15,446 --> 00:19:16,275
Yeah.

374
00:19:17,826 --> 00:19:20,688
So you think this tumor
is causing hallucinations.

375
00:19:20,688 --> 00:19:21,619
Visitations.

376
00:19:22,999 --> 00:19:23,826
Visions.

377
00:19:26,068 --> 00:19:30,446
When I have the treatment,
they turn violent.

378
00:19:31,515 --> 00:19:32,446
What do they do?

379
00:19:33,377 --> 00:19:34,171
The violence.

380
00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:38,653
Shoot me full of arrows,

381
00:19:40,999 --> 00:19:42,309
dry on me.

382
00:19:42,309 --> 00:19:45,895
Just get inside my
head and haunt me.

383
00:19:47,481 --> 00:19:51,481
Frankly, I'm starting
to get used to them.

384
00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:54,653
It's just that when I have
the radiation, it gets worse.

385
00:19:56,308 --> 00:19:58,171
So saints and
martyrs don't want you

386
00:19:58,171 --> 00:19:59,895
to have medical treatment.

387
00:19:59,895 --> 00:20:04,206
Well, they seem so angry.

388
00:20:04,206 --> 00:20:06,688
So you reject the hypothesis

389
00:20:06,688 --> 00:20:09,240
that the tumor pressing
down your brain

390
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:10,308
causes hallucinations.

391
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,171
I don't rule that out.

392
00:20:13,171 --> 00:20:17,515
That seems more likely than
divine visitations, right?

393
00:20:17,515 --> 00:20:20,343
Except that my
entire life is based

394
00:20:20,343 --> 00:20:22,999
on the belief that the divine
can communicate with us.

395
00:20:24,171 --> 00:20:25,791
The divine usually
communicated with saints

396
00:20:25,791 --> 00:20:26,826
when they were alive.

397
00:20:28,343 --> 00:20:29,688
Do you think you're a saint?

398
00:20:33,206 --> 00:20:34,653
Not even a little bit

399
00:20:35,860 --> 00:20:39,068
So you're refusing
medical treatment

400
00:20:39,068 --> 00:20:41,653
because you don't want to
upset saints who visit you?

401
00:20:43,860 --> 00:20:46,274
Look, if the tumor
is gonna kill me,

402
00:20:47,929 --> 00:20:50,826
to me that means that
it's opening up a door

403
00:20:50,826 --> 00:20:52,033
to the afterlife, right?

404
00:20:52,033 --> 00:20:53,481
Like that's, that's
what I believe.

405
00:20:55,688 --> 00:20:58,171
This thing is just
such a slow grower

406
00:20:58,171 --> 00:20:59,688
that it's almost like,

407
00:20:59,688 --> 00:21:01,895
it's just kind of cracking
the door open a little bit.

408
00:21:01,895 --> 00:21:04,550
And the doctors want
to close that door

409
00:21:05,515 --> 00:21:06,757
for as long as possible.

410
00:21:06,757 --> 00:21:08,999
Right. And that's
what I don't understand.

411
00:21:11,860 --> 00:21:12,688
Why?

412
00:21:14,757 --> 00:21:17,412
Like why would I ever
want to close the door

413
00:21:17,412 --> 00:21:18,239
to God's kingdom?

414
00:21:21,619 --> 00:21:24,791
[soft dramatic music]

415
00:21:55,412 --> 00:21:57,860
[Narrator] Next
time on, Forgive Me.

416
00:21:57,860 --> 00:22:00,412
Why does your
doctor come here?

417
00:22:00,412 --> 00:22:01,446
I missed an appointment.

418
00:22:01,446 --> 00:22:02,274
Oh come on.

419
00:22:04,205 --> 00:22:05,999
You want me to
see a psychiatrist.

420
00:22:07,033 --> 00:22:07,860
Did you?

421
00:22:08,826 --> 00:22:10,826
Yeah informal valuation.

422
00:22:10,826 --> 00:22:11,653
And?

423
00:22:14,033 --> 00:22:15,860
They want me to get treatment.

424
00:22:15,860 --> 00:22:18,688
Medication might
help you sleep.

425
00:22:19,929 --> 00:22:21,137
I'm not worried
about me sleeping

426
00:22:21,137 --> 00:22:23,137
when I know I have
a brain tumor.

427
00:22:23,137 --> 00:22:24,102
It's back?

428
00:22:27,619 --> 00:22:30,308
I lost [fumbles]

429
00:22:30,308 --> 00:22:33,308
Told him I aborted his child.

430
00:22:33,308 --> 00:22:36,826
I mean, I didn't break
it to him gently.

431
00:22:36,826 --> 00:22:40,343
I [fumbles] that information
like a sword through his heart.

432
00:22:40,343 --> 00:22:42,515
[fumbles]

433
00:22:45,481 --> 00:22:49,033
I suppose there's not really
a great way to hear that.

434
00:22:49,033 --> 00:22:51,757
[dramatic music]

435
00:22:53,653 --> 00:22:56,860
You know how a
priest is celibate,

436
00:22:56,860 --> 00:22:58,102
I'm not talking about sex.

437
00:22:59,136 --> 00:23:02,068
[music intensifies]

438
00:23:38,860 --> 00:23:40,377
Forgive me father
for I've sinned.

439
00:23:40,377 --> 00:23:44,688
It's been about a week
since my last confession.

440
00:23:44,688 --> 00:23:46,895
You can't confess to yourself.

441
00:23:46,895 --> 00:23:48,584
It's stupid, of course you can.

442
00:23:51,929 --> 00:23:54,584
I don't think it will be
official by you doing that.

443
00:23:54,634 --> 00:23:59,184
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